Published On: Fri, Dec 18th, 2015

6 Things to discuss before going to sleep



Both husband and wife are remained busy whole the day in routine works and performing duties. In the evening, you find some time to spend with each other before sleeping and it can make a huge difference in both your moods and your marriage.

Though, there are some behaviors that could be harmful to your relationship in the long run. We are mentioning some bedroom errors that you should shun, specialists of the view.

  1. Going to bed at different times

Sometimes it is observed that different schedules of spouses led them into resentment and with time it increases. Psychotherapist Marcia Naomi Berger states that “It’s a recipe for feeling lonely and emotionally (and physically) detached from each other. The best thing is being a duo is the warm, fuzzy spell which you share right before going to sleep.

She further told that “A clash can exist that you require to discuss prior in the day.” Because it can be possible that it may become something larger if you don’t get the chance to discuss it in detail.

  1. Being inconsiderate of your spouse’s schedule

Caring is very important in a good relationship. If there is no caring then it’s nothing than a fake relationship.

Becky Whetstone, who is a Marriage and family therapist, stated that “One husband I counseled was a physician and had to be at the hospital by 6 am every week day. He begged to his wife, who was a stay-at-home mom, to not watch TV when he was going to take a fine night’s sleep, but she desired to keep it the entire night as background noise. Regardless of each attempt, for example recommending her to take headphones or he get earplugs and blinders for his eyes — not anything gave him peace and she would not budge. After some years they divorced.

  1. Not connecting with each other before going to sleep

Sometimes you are very tired and desire to sleep immediately you get into bed, but it is good to spare some time to emotionally attach with your spouse prior than going to sleep. You will observe that it will give you gladness for a long time.

LiYana Silver, who is a relationship coach states that “Take the time to talk about the highlights and low points of your day. There’s no need to offer advice or therapy to each other, just keep it to a short share.”

  1. Prioritizing screen-time over quality time with your spouse

It is seen that people use social media before going to sleep. It is better to leave all the devices before you go for sleep or when you are with your spouse. Spend maximum time with your spouse.

Marcia Naomi Berger told that “Getting a tablet or phone to bed with you spoils your relationship in two ways: First, it detaches you emotionally from each other. Secondly, when we are on an electronic device shortly before sleeping, the stimulation from the screen tends to keep you awake.

  1. Self-grooming in bed

Avoid shaving or clipping your toenails, etc because leaving your partner disgusted is never a good thing.

  1. Going to bed angry

Never go on bed with anger because it permits the clash to go over to the next day and worsen confusions and anger and your spouse will feel that the issue isn’t significant sufficient for you to undertake directly.

Berger stated that “Do your best to clear up issues well before bedtime, so when you’re ready to turn in for the night you’ll both want to communicate lovingly, in words, tone and actions.”


About the Author

Sidra Muntaha

- Sidra Tul Muntaha is a journalist (MA-Mass Communication and M.Phil in Mass Communication) based in Lahore. She is working as an editor at fashion, style and entertainment in the section of the Kooza. She writes fashion and entertainment articles for The Kooza News.